Speakers in the transcript are identified as follows:
Spacecraft:
CDR Commander Eugene S. Paul
…
MMP Martian Module Pilot Brian R. Cho
MSP Mission Specialist, Biology Gregor K. (Reggie) Mamchur
…
| CDR | Brian, may I speak to you privately? |
| MMP | (Laughter.) That might be a challenge, Gene. |
| CDR | Indulge me. Over here? |
| MMP | Sure. (Indistinct.) What’s up? |
| CDR | Well, I have sort of a situation I hope you can help me with. You know our Community Simulator? |
| MMP | (Laughter.) Yes, I’m familiar with it. |
| CDR | Thing is, Reggie is logging an, ah, excessive number of hours on it. |
| MMP | Oh? Is that a problem? |
| CDR | He’s missed a meal and two workouts, so, yes. |
| MMP | This mission’s been rough on all of us. Maybe he’s just busy in the lab? Modeling spongifores is time-consuming – |
| CDR | So my question for you is – and I’m not accusing you at all, but – Did you make any changes to the Simulator? |
| MMP | Changes? |
| CDR | To the code. |
| MMP | Oh, ah – (Laughter.) I did actually. Nothing big. |
| CDR | … Brian, that is – That is very dangerous. |
| MMP | Just a few things to keep everyone engaged. The personality modules. Some conversation options — |
| CDR | This isn’t Tetris you’re messing with. It’s a complex, carefully controlled social simulation. It’s what’s going to make sure we’re scientists when we get there and not just a bunch of non-functional meatheads. |
| MMP | I understand. |
| CDR | It took the psych team and the dev team twelve years to put that thing together. This mission is too sensitive for you to go splashing around in it. |
| MMP | Yes, Gene. |
| CDR | So I want you to undo your changes before 2300. |
| MMP | Ooh — |
| CDR | “Ooh”? |
| MMP | I don’t think I can do that. |
| CDR | What? |
| MMP | They didn’t have a repository in place, so I had to change the live code. An oversight on their part, I’d say. |
| CDR | They didn’t have a repository because no one was supposed to change anything! You didn’t make a backup? |
| MMP | I’m not really in that habit. |
| CDR | Where is Reggie now? |
| MMP | In the simulation room, I believe. |
| CDR | All right. Let’s see what the hell you’ve done. (Indistinct. Crosstalk.) Reggie? Reggie, a moment… |
| MSP | In a minute. |
| CDR | Now, Reggie. |
| MSP | Oh, for – Just a moment. Let me wrap this up. |
| CDR | Is that – ? That looks like your wife! |
| MMP | I know! |
| CDR | And that’s your back yard! Oh, my God! Even the compost pile… |
| MMP | We’re about to get some gardening done, if you don’t mind. |
| CDR | The graphics – Like you could just stick your hand in and dig! And her freckles! Did you do this, Brian? |
| MMP | I guess. I didn’t think I got in the render modules, though. |
| CDR | This – This is crazy. Reggie, can you turn the camera – |
| MSP | [Indistinct.] |
| CDR | When you get a chance. Are they all in there? I just want to see. Tell her — |
| MSP | It’s my wife. |
| CDR | Yes, of course. It’s just – I’ve never seen anything like this. Ever. (Pause.) Brian, you didn’t do this. |
| MSP | Yes, I did. |
| CDR | Not all of it. You couldn’t have. |
| MSP | Pretty sure I did, Gene. |
| CDR | No. Something else did this. Did Mission Control send an update and we missed it? |
| MSP | Not a chance. I verify those logs. |
| MMP | You two are making it hard to concentrate. |
| CDR | Maybe … Maybe you just opened the door. Caught their eye. Let them in. |
| MSP | Who? |
| CDR | Maybe we moved into their neighborhood. |
| MSP | Are you talking about Grant and Taka? We let them take their turns. We’ve been talking about a two-player – |
| CDR | No. Something else. God, that looks just incredible. The sky – That sun is making it warmer in here. Am I crazy? |
| MSP | What something else? |
| CDR | Something smart. Something that doesn’t want a visit. |
| MSP | Commander, what are you talking about? |
| CDR | We should figure that out. We should do that right away. (Pause.) Reggie, can I play next? |
