Sometimes a banner ad just won’t be ignored. Check this out:
The abbreviations… they burn…
This bird has problems. It weaves languidly and peers at itself with a fevered, hyperthyroid eye. Would you get a mortgage from this bird? I hope not.
I don’t even know what these things are, but they dance and they’re terrifying.
Dance… dance forever…
Because nothing in the world is scarier than ass cheeks, some last-minute effort to protect the world’s youth puts a digital skirt on this ass. Almost as funny as all the digital bra parade known as “Showgirls on VH-1.”
New from Land’s End
Also notice the awkward way the product is cut-and-pasted into her hand — it goes well with the crappy way they shaved off her left flank. These are the perils of modeling — one minute, you’re showing off your fabulous ass in a clip-art photo session, and the next minute some crappy graphic artist makes crappy pixelated changes and you’re glad you didn’t authorize use of your face.
Because if they use your face, this might happen:
Your options include seppuku
This woman is doomed forever to peer behind that sheaf of hair for match.com, as she seeks men as young as 18 but no older than Hugh Jackman to send her pictures she can laugh at and ignore.
But she is just a model. This guy is not:
Ten minutes with me will make you pierce your own eardrums
Also in the not-so-tempting offers department:
`Cause you`ll need this if you date through match.com
Check out that “cash transactions only” caveat. That is impossibly shady. I would click to investigate, but I`m afraid tously brunettes would tell me too much about their sex lives.
With just that hint of insanity that’s so attractive in a woman
That was fun.
